As I reflect on my grandniece’s journey from child to young woman, I’m reminded of words that capture the paradox of her love and strength:
There is nothing more tender than fierce, nothing more fierce than tenderness. — Glennon Doyle
My Dearest Harper,
You may be too young to read these words right now—you are only two, full of curiosity, laughter, and that unstoppable spark that lights up every room you enter. But one day you will read this. One day, you will know that from the very beginning, I saw in you something rare and precious: the living embodiment of tender fierceness.
I hope you never lose that. I hope you never feel the need to trade it for something smaller or safer. But if you ever do, I want you to know how to find it again.
That is why I’m writing this letter. To give you a practice you can return to whenever the world makes you forget what you already know—that you are whole, worthy, and radiant exactly as you are.
The Practice: 🌸 The Mirror of Tender Fierceness
- Find a quiet moment. Sit in a place where you feel safe, with a mirror nearby. Even a small hand mirror will do.
- Breathe yourself here. Inhale gently through your nose, exhale slowly through your mouth. Feel your body soften as you arrive.
- Look softly. Gaze into the mirror, not with judgment but with love—like the way I look at you. Notice the spark in your eyes, the innocence, and the strength.
- Whisper back. Speak words of love to yourself. Try:
- “I see you.”
- “You are whole.”
- “You are both soft and strong.”
- Or even my favorite: “There is nothing more tender than fierce, nothing more fierce than tenderness.”
- Listen inward. Pause after each line. Notice what rises—a warmth, a memory, even resistance. Let it all be there.
- Close with a blessing. Place your hand over your heart and whisper:
“I carry what she carries. She carries what I carry. We are light.”
Harper, I know the world will sometimes try to tell you who you should be, how you should look, or what you should hide. But this mirror will always tell you the truth: you are already enough.
So, when life feels heavy and you forget your own light, I hope you return to this practice. I hope you look into the mirror and see what I see: a girl who has grown into a woman who has never lost her tender fierceness.
And if you ever doubt, just remember: I loved you this way from the start.
With all my heart,
Your Great-Aunt Lee