As the ol’ maestro moans
Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
~John Lennon
“Good morning,” we say to each other, wondering what feels so odd about today. Our plan is to spend time at the museum to see Diego Rivera’s Paris paintings. Little do we know that we will find ourselves meeting the totally unexpected and finding our own power within.
This day, we awaken early only to find frozen toes and noses. Yikes! The beastly furnace refuses to operate. Too old and too cold, the old heating maestro moans and groans, sputtering its last breath.
Oh my, 19 degrees outdoors and a frigid, breath-fogging 54 inside. We sit together, us long time besties, two seventy-something goddesses huddling together with our sweet tail-wagging companion.
We find the old oil-filled radiator, which takes its sweet time to even begin to overcome the chill in the house. We huddle closer to the only source of heat, our companion curled up warming our feet.
“Whatever shall we do?”
“We could call Handyman Andy.”
”Oh yes, he’s such a hunk. He’ll bring the tools and fix our cranky old beast.”
Andy to the Rescue!
Handyman Andy, a real he-man, swiftly comes our way. He pokes his head in the door and sees our dilemma.
“Ma’ams, you just keep yourselves warm there. I’m fixin’ t’see what’s causing the ol’ beast to quit workin’.”
”Thank you, Andy,” we both chime in, fluttering our eyelashes. “We sure do thank you for helping us out here, before we both freeze off our frigging patooties!”
Andy chuckles as he turns to go back out the door, and promptly sets off to examine the ghastly situation.
“Our champion is here!” we sigh with delight, appreciating this little relief.
Certainly, he will fix the old beast. Nothing more to be done, so we wait. We sit snuggled in our hats, scarves, mittens and coats. We burrow deeper under the hefty piles of blankets while humming a sweet little omage to the Great Mother.
“Grateful are we for the blessed baby heater bringing a little bit of warmth to our freezing place,” we chant. “Happy are we for Handyman Andy who brings us a bit of hope—‘especially cuz he’s waaay too easy on the eyes.”
After a few rounds, we’re content, so we come out from under the blankets and sip hot tea as the sun streams through the front window.
Flash Back to Long Ago Far Away
She and I knew each other way back, so long ago, in a land way too far away. I raised my baby girl in my old ranch house just outside town.
She chopped wood and hauled water to her tiny log cabin overlooking the great wilderness. In her woodstove, she built a fire and rustled up a most delicious stew of fresh vegetables and herbs from her summer garden. Later, she relaxed by the fire and warmed her toes while sipping wine, dining on freshly baked Dilly Bread and her hearthwarming stew.
And here we are today, where she lives in updated hi-fi luxury. Her little Craftsman home is heated by an old, sometimes cranky furnace, and she cooks her meals on a shiny modern gas stove. No fires, no chopping wood, and no hauling water.
And Then the Unexpected Happens!
Every day may not be good… but there’s something good in every day.
~Alice Morse Earle
Our Hunkman Andy finally returns, offering updates. “Which would you like first? The good news or the bad?” his bushy eyebrows knit together into a painfully furrowed brow.
“Good first, please!” we eagerly reply, with the expectancy of 5 year olds on Christmas morning.
“Well, the good news is that the beast, as old and cold as he is, can still be revived.” His face brightens a broad smile and then a low sigh, hoping to be relieved of the next part of his update.
“But not today,” he continues. His face flushes with dread. “Nope, I’m sorry to say, the repair can’t happen tomorrow or the next. It will be a few days, ma’ams. By that time, the weather’ll be warm enough for flip flops.”
We look at each other and back at Andy. “Are you sure there’s nothing that can be done?”
From his phone, Andy retrieves a notification that the beast’s broken piece has been located. “Nuttin’ ma’am’s. I’ll give y’all a holler when the part comes in.”
As he opens the door to depart, he looks up, nods to us both. “Y’all keep warm now, y’hear?”
Never Say Never
With that we snuggle back down under the covers.
After a few sighs, we both exclaim with exasperation, “Oh my, what ever shall we do?” as we peek out at each other from under the piles of blankets and hats.
“The temperatures will surely plummet, hitting rock bottom tonight,” we wide-eye each other in worried dismay.
“While still our toes and noses stay froze—and tonight, it’s getting even colder. Oh, my!”
With each exhale, we write SOS messages across the frosty air. Whatever shall we do?
If you laugh at it, you can deal with it.
~Joan Rivers
We pile on more sweaters and blankets, more scarves, gloves, and hats. Two pairs of socks, the long, soft, fuzzy ones, and pink furry house slippers. And a giggle and a jiggle. Because nothing more can be done. And we can hardly move.
Another pot of tea is served with pumpkin toast and yummy summery peach jam. We warm our tummies and hands, telling silly stories of tree planting and skinny dipping that hot summer long ago. Laughter lifts the chill, carrying the warmth to our hearts and souls.
”Well, we can’t just sit here while the temperature drops! The pipes will freeze!”
“What else is there to do?”
“Heat! More heat is obviously what we need.”
The Demand For a Plan
We know it is essential. But no other heaters are to be found anywhere in the house or from our neighbors. “Oh, shit, this just ain’t gonna do!” We chuckle a naughty cackle.
Still, there is hope, enough to go around till there’s a demand for a plan, something clever, something ever so easy.
As temperatures continue to drop dramatically, a spark, a simple remembering strikes us both, “Let’s get real quiet and beseech the Great Mother for guidance.”
Almost instantaneously, we know what to do. Smiling, our confidence beams. Heads together a plan is conceived. “More tea, more gloves, more socks. We have a mission!” We cheer each other on.
“More radiant heaters is what we need, and we know where they be!”
Off we fly with our faithful companion. Across the icy roads, up the steep hills, and down the slippery slopes. “Follow the sacred path of least resistance,” whispers the Great Mother’s voice. “No hassle, no stress,” she says gently.
“Onward through the slickery streets!” We call out to the wind, “Onward!”
Finally arriving at our destination, our warmth awaits. “Ah, marvelous!” We squeal with delight. “Divine relief is on its way.” Retrieving not one but two blessed borrowed heaters, we boldly haul them home to save the day.
The heaters are quickly plugged in with loving care. Trust and faith never falter. Ahhhhh, finally! We feel our toes and noses thaw.
Heat is filling our little space, and just as the temp is hitting 60 degrees. WHAM! The power goes down. All goes dark.
“Ohhhhhhh noooooooo!” We look at each other and flail. “How can this be?”
She Who Chops Wood …
It takes a minute to find the source of the setback, and the breaker switch is flipped back on. Aha! Women of action are we.
Yes, we knew all along we had the power. Making fun with mountains of blankets, laughing at our silly stories, sipping tea, making a plan, schlepping heaters across town—all have quite unexpectedly warmed us within. Just as she who chops wood is twice warmed.
Now we are warmed by the heaters, by love and trust and a simple knowing that all is perfect. We peel off the layers and sip hot chocolate as though nothing at all has happened. We laugh at the antics of our day, how all is well, even our toes and noses.
She would consider each day a miracle – which indeed it is, when you consider the number of unexpected things that could happen in each second of our fragile existences.
~Paulo Coelho
Please note: this sweet, funny little story was co-created with my dear friend and writing coach, A. Colmery. Thank you my friend for helping to bring this to life. ~LB